I Feel Like a Quarantine Failure
This is what I’m hearing from many people these days and I’m not alone - coaches, counsellors and therapists report this as being a top subject.
Why? We put pressure on ourselves to keep up with the glossy images and stories of others who post how great their isolation is going (and good for them!)...they are rockin the home schooling, baking exotic things, exercising everyday, making healthy food, are not contemplating divorce or binging on junk food and Netflix.
Here’s the thing, when we compare ourselves to anyone it is a race to the bottom. Cue the worthiness demons. Then starts the self judgement and immobilization follows. The outcome? We feel like we can’t do quarantine right, wasting this time and not getting enough out of it like it’s a holiday...but it is actually a fu$&!ng pandemic and we have no construct for this. Maybe everything you’ve know has changed including access to your work, support and security. So if you need to stay in your pyjamas, eat chips and cry I’d call that coping too.
Remember that in times of stress we typically see what I call “overfunctioners” and “underfunctioners”. On either ends of the continuum these are coping mechanisms and both have benefits and drawbacks. Allow yourself to embrace your tendency and accept how it serves you - it probably makes you feel safe. But if you want to make some changes to improve your situation after you’ve evaluated yourself against yourself then go for it.
But remember, there are no quarantine awards and while you may not be baking bread you may be facing challenges and building resiliency which is calorie free, doesn’t get eaten up or go mouldy- just sayin.